Thursday, April 6, 2006

This is me!

Have you heard my story? Well, I thought I'd tell it again since I can't figure out how to leave it permanently on the side bar of this blog... Rewind 10 years. 1996 was a golden year in many ways. I lost over 20 kilos, I got down to 55 kilos. It took a while. It took around a year. It took support at home and support from girl friends in school. Suddenly the fat jokes ceased. Okay, every now a then one of my siblings reminded me of my past but it didn't matter - or so I thought. I looked my skiny frame in the mirror and all I saw was "fat." The best explanation I found for that was that my mind wasn't as fast as my body in losing weight. I gained all the weight I lost back and some more when I moved to the States. I did really well my Sophomore year but that didn't last long. Junior year was the worse. I had problems with a relationship. For the first time what I felt inside was showing on the outside. Oh, I was also more concerned about my hair than my looks. The Black hair is an institution in itself. Lately I had to decide sweating it's not as bad as being fat. 1996 was a long time ago and here I am. My husband has been very supportive. He's dropped a lot of pounds himself. He reminds me of what's important, he holds me accountable. I don't have the same support from friends at work as before. We started doing the Biggest Loser club but since I got married I haven't been in the lunch meetings. My story is still being told. I wonder if I'll lose the weight by the end of this year. I wonder if I'll be a skinny mom like the ones we see on TV nowadays. What I experienced is that real women have curves. I know I can spend a whole day wondering, reading blogs, trying to find inspiration on health sites on the net but most of the time that stuff makes me feel really bad. I decided to focus on self and working on self little by little every day. Thanks to God my mind is clear, I know what it takes and I'm taking the time to do it. We'll see what the numbers are next week and next month. My goal is to get down to at least 152 by next month. I will reach my goal of 125 pounds. Yes I will! The picture of me and Zeke was taken Jan. 17, 2006 at 152 lbs.