Thursday, April 12, 2012

How to Overcome the Fear of Asking for Help

During my 3 years of motherhood I have met a lot of moms ruled by the fear of asking for help. For some reason they have developed a "pioneering spirit" with which they are expected to do EVERYTHING on their own. No matter what year or season of the year, you are supposed to be everything from chef to chauffeur and everything in between. The results of this pioneering spirit? Exhaustion, lack of patience, dissatisfaction... you get the point. Have analyzed the reasons why you feel like you have to do it ALL by yourself lately?
I firmly that mothers should enjoy being part of Community (the expertise of others outside of your family applies here). When you are stretched thin to the point of breaking, your heavenly Father has placed a community of people around you to be of help. Here are a few things you can enjoy when you truly belong in Communities:
• Communities are Creative. God knows not everyone has extended family available or available cash for babysitting. Many communities out there came up with Babysitting Co-ops. If this idea is too much for you, you can always pray that God will send you two people who will do it for free for you. Recently I met a mother who pays a small fee to a middle school girl who plays with her kids once a week while she pays bills and cooks dinner. There's a lot of creativity out there!
• Communities are Resourceful. You will never know how many resources are out there unless you overcome your fear to ask for help. I know a group of women who have everything from legal expertise to personal training. If I ever need something else, they know how to get it. The key is not letting fear stop me from asking for those resources. You have to speak up my friend.
• Communities spark Generosity. You can't help but become more giving when you are part of Community. You become mindful of the needs of others and engage in the power of unity to make the most good. We know that two are better than one because they can help each other succeed (Ecclesiastes 4:9) . Think about the power of unity that comes from more than one giving from the heart.
Don't let fear affect your quality of life. Sure, there are hard days in the land of motherhood but God has a beautiful community around you to make those days a little sweeter.

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