Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Love is what matters most


Every Spring was the same thing. My kids would burst out in tears because they did not win a certain  competition. How could they? We were all newbies to that culture. There were kids with two generations behind their preschool selves making sure they would win. And they did.

I was too exhausted to do all the work they needed to win that certain competition.

I remember a teacher asking me with guilt behind her voice:

"Do you want her to lose?"

I didn't answer. I exhausted.

Not much has changed since then. The scenario is the same but the competition is now digital.

Parents have the right to be proud of their kids. The digital space is a great place to display that parental rite of passage.

As I try to find meaning in my own parenting journey, I remember that love is what matters most.

We all hear the stories behind the lives of high achievers. Nature, nurture or otherwise, not everyone will get the A. Not everyone will be in the Dean's list.

These temporary achievements are of importance, but love matters most.

I decided to let go of the good and hold on to the great.

When I stare a low grades, I ask myself: Does my kid have a good heart? Do they display compassion for others? Do I need to beg them to be thankful or polite?

Instead of thinking of a digitally social acceptable post. I think of my kid as they age and have my grandchildren. Will the grades matter then? Maybe. Yet, love will matter most.

At the end of the day, God gives grace to every parent. We all want to do our best for our children.

I am determined not to be caught competing with others as far as the achievements I display. I want to love my children well.

This journey of love, can't be displayed online. It is a private, slow process and the fruits will be ripped decades from now.

Loving well matters. Let's love our children well in private and let's watch them bloom.

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