The Marriage Building Check List: are you up to Code?

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

"The wise woman builds her house but the foolish pulls it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1

I am intrigued with the idea of home building. My husband and I watched one of those house flipping shows last night and I am aware that it takes a lot of work to get a home built and ready for a family. This little Bible verse stuck with me because in it we see a woman doing the building. Most of us can agree that a home doesn't maintain itself, so as builders of our families, it would be wise to have a Building Maintenance Check List. Here are 4 areas to check: 

1. Foundation - a building with a foundation problem is ruined. It is unsafe for a family to live in a place that can cause their demise. The foundation of a Christian marriage is Jesus Himself. He said that it is necessary to dug deep and lay the foundation on the rock so that WHEN the flood rises and the stream beat against the house it cannot shake it for it is founded on the rock (Luke 6:48). Check the foundation of your building. Dig deep and lay it on the Rock of Ages (Isaiah 26:4).
2. Roof - we had some roof work in our house recently. I never noticed the thing needed work done but there were several stains from leaks that came from the roof. As a builder, it is wise to get an outside expert to take a look at your building so that you can be better protected. We have no worries about heavy rains or against strong winds that come by our area every now and then. Marriage counselors are the people with the expertise to help you better protect your marriage. I have found that wise counseling has helped my marriage immensely against the winds and downpours of life. You don't want to get emergency help only when your roof has caved in: get a regular check up and avoid calamity. 
3. Windows - Windows can be a lovely thing when they are well maintained. They protect us from harsh weather elements as well as let cooling winds in. They can also be a favorite entry point for thieves or wild animals. I see the heart as the window to your building. Proverbs 4:23 says "Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life." As the builder of your home, is your heart being guarded? If peace, joy and love are flowing out, that's a great sign. If wrath, jealousy and envy are allowed to get in your heart, your building is in danger. Guard your heart because you can't give what you don't have.
4. Safety Equipment - As a builder you need to ensure that all smoke detectors, carbon monoxide detectors, and fire extinguishers are in good working order. Replace batteries in appropriate devices as needed, or at least twice each year. When it comes to your own marriage, how is your safety equipment working? I think that accountability is the safety equipment of a wise builder. Godly accountability can detect smoke coming from your marriage. Once you are open to that kind of help, you will be able to succeed in case of an emergency. I think that time alone with your spouse recharges your batteries. My husband and I experienced such refreshment recently when we got away for two nights. If you can't travel for any reason, date nights will do. Be sure to be a fountain of blessing to your husband for he will rejoice in you (Proverbs 5:18).

I want to be a builder. I want to build a stronger marriage, build strong children who know how amazingly loved they are. I want to build strong friendships where iron sharpens iron. 
My challenge for you and I today is that we check these 4 areas and get to working on solidifying the homes we have been blessed with. 

Proverbs 14:1 commentary
Becky said...

Thanks Cintia, these are really good ways of looking at marriage. I know that counseling is always a good thing. And as someone that has been married for almost 38 years it is nice to have a reminder that we need to take care of that marriage and not take it for granted.

Cintia Listenbee said...

thanks for the sweet comment and congrats on the 38 years of marriage!!! I'll get there too.